thediagonallie:

when I was in high school my AP english teacher told us we weren’t allowed to eat in class so I took that as a personal challenge to see what the most ridiculous thing I could eat in class without getting caught was so I started bringing soup to class and as soon as I’d crack the lid of my thermos the tiniest bit this football player that sat like 3 rows in front of me would going “I SMELL MEAT SOMEONE HAS SOUP” and no one ever believed him

oh-woah-dope:

since this is yahoo, can someone help me please?

i held a girl’s hand the other day and she didn’t come to school for like a week. did i made her pregnant?

thorhead:

thorhead:

I wonder if the young girls playing on the trampoline next door know that

1. I can see them
2. I can hear them singing You Can’t Stop The Beat from Hairspray
3. they are really bad singers and
4. I can probably get a YouTube-worthy video of them from my current position

gUYS I PUT ON MY COUSINS HOCKEY MASK AND STOOD AT THE WINDOW AND YELLED “STOP YOUR INFERNAL SINGSONG I’M TRYING TO MURDER HERE” AND THEY SCREAMED AND TRIED TO RUN AWAY AND ONE FELL OVER AND STARTED CRYING

(Source: thordoftherings)

lightrup:

duhavin:

lightrup:

lightrup:

maybe university isn’t a good idea

maybe becoming a tree is a good idea

next person who reblogs this is getting shot

shoot me

haithinkimfunny:

queenestelle:

gothist:

GET IGNORED SO MUCH BITCHES CALL ME TERMS AND CONDITIONS

at least you get accepted no matter what

that’s the most uplifting thing i’ve seen all day 

(Source: stevebrule)

tavrosofnitram:

“let me like that post so i can look at it again sometime!”

u want da news? i got ya news!!!!

irenigg:

thats the news!!!

(Source: CNN)

damngruchy:

supermassiveasshole:

i was teaching my grandma to use computer so we can talk on skype and such but today she went kinda mad at me because “i didnt show her the knitting programme” and i was like what

and it comes out she accidentally opened ms excel and found out its a great way to create knitting patterns

my grandma is 82